How to Deal With a Depressed Roommate

Living with a depressed person is not an easy task. Depression can cause the person to withdraw, neglect responsibilities, lash out and commit self harm. The illness can strain your relationship with your roommate and leave you feeling uncomfortable, helpless and resentful. While you may want to help your roommate overcome his illness, do not try to rescue your roommate from depression. You are not the cause of the depression or the cure. While you cannot cure your roommate, you can provide support and encouragement.

Instructions

• 1

  Take the time to learn about depression. Recognize that it is a real illness that not everyone can easily overcome. Do not discount your roommate's depression. Do not say things such as "just snap out of it," "look on the bright side," or "shouldn't you be better by now."

• 2

  Ask your roommate what you can do to help. Tell him that you care about him and he is not alone. Remind him of the positive things in his life and listen without judgment when your roommate confides in you. However, do not become your roommate's enabler. Do not make excuses or tell lies for him. Furthermore, set limits so that you will not feel burned-out or resentful. Recognize that you can only do so much and must take care of yourself before you can help anyone else.

• 3

  Encourage your roommate to seek help. Suggest an appointment with a general health physician if you believe she will not want to see a mental health professional. Offer to help her find a doctor and go with her on the first visit. Encourage her to make a list of symptoms, feelings and thoughts she has experienced to discuss with the doctor.

• 4

  Encourage your roommate to get active. Invite him to exercise, go for a walk, see a movie or have dinner. Continue making offers no matter how many times your roommate refuses. Do not feel discouraged if your roommate rejects your offers.

• 5

  Reach out to your roommate's loved ones for support. Call upon her family, friends, church and others who are close to her for help. Encourage your roommate to join a local support group. Join one as well if you feel the need to speak with others with a similar experience.

• 6

  Do not avoid discussing your feelings about the situation with your roommate. Gently talk to your roommate about your feelings to avoid creating resentment or an awkward living situation. Remind your roommate that you have needs as well. Try to avoid expressing your feelings in anger or any other manner you will later regret.

• 7

  Watch your roommate for signs that he may need professional help. Signs include: threats to hurt himself or others; hallucinations and delusions; alcohol and drug abuse; lack of food or sleep; and lack of personal hygiene. Talk to your roommate about your concerns if you believe he is suicidal, and seek professional help. Do not leave him alone if you believe he will commit self-harm.