Explanation of the Grief Cycle

Grief is an emotional cycle in which people deal with loss and illness. Most people go through a grieving process when they lose someone close to them or when they find out that they have an illness or terminal disease. There are seven steps that people go through when they are grieving, which is called the grief cycle.

Shock

• The first step of the grief cycle is shock. This is the step where people become "paralyzed" after hearing the bad news. The symptoms of this type of shock are similar to those of the shock one experiences from an accident. Their heart rate can elevate, they become pale and listless.

Denial

• Denial is the next stage in which people do not want to believe what has happened. They say this could not possibly happen to them. If it was a family member that died, they may not want to accept that they are really gone. If they have just found out they have cancer, they may convince themselves that the doctor is wrong.

Anger

• In the anger stage, the griever lets out all of the emotions they have been bottling up during the first two stages. They may break things, yell at people or even hurt themselves. It is, however, important that they get these feelings out as part of the process. Built up anger can raise the blood pressure.

Bargaining

• In this phase, they will begin the bargaining process. They want to find a way out of this problem. Bargaining is a big deal for someone with a terminal illness. They will be asking for second opinion, hounding doctors about procedures that maybe they forgot to mention and praying to God to save them.

Depression

• Depression will set in when they finally realize there is nothing they can do about what has, or is, happening. They may not want to talk to anyone and may hide out in their home or room for days. They may not eat right, which can make health matters even worse.

Testing

• In the testing cycle, the person is trying to find solutions to the problem, but realistically, unlike during the bargaining stage. They may seek counseling, other doctors, advice from friends and family. What they are doing is testing one last time to see if there really are no other options.

Acceptance

• Once the person realizes there are no other options, they will accept fate. The person who died was meant to move on. The illness is something that they cannot do anything about, but they can try to enjoy their last days, weeks, months or years of life. This is the time when the griever moves forward and goes on with life.