How to Approach a Depressed Person

Depression may seem like a confusing condition to outsiders. Friends and family will often wonder why depressed people can't just "snap out of it" or "toughen up." After all, ups and downs are an ordinary part of life. But for the clinically depressed, these emotions are more than just typical ups and downs. Depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain that leads to seemingly irrational actions and thoughts, and this must be taken seriously by friends and family who wish to help. The last thing you want to do is trigger a negative response in a depressed person or worsen her depression.

Instructions

• 1

  Suggest an appointment with a regular physician, and offer to make this appointment. Depressed people will often fail to seek help because the idea seems daunting or hopeless. Setting up an appointment with a regular doctor will seem less invasive than setting up an appointment with a psychiatrist.

• 2

  Help your loved one make a list of symptoms, especially if you are the spouse, roommate, parent, or child of a depressed person. You may notice things your loved one hasn't even considered, such as unusual sleeping habits or feelings of illness at particular times of the day.

• 3

  Educate yourself on depression---the symptoms, effects, and treatments. The more you know about the illness, the better equipped you'll be to help your loved one through it.

• 4

  Give your love and support. Offer to help with small tasks---things like cleaning or making phone calls can be very difficult for a depressed person.

• 5

  Avoid a commanding tone. Instead of telling your loved one to cheer up, ask what you can do to help, or suggest a low-energy activity you can do together like a movie or a walk.

• 6

  Seek to understand rather than diagnose. Don't "talk him out" of his depressed feelings with phrases like "tomorrow will be better" or "you're better than this." This will only make him feel worse. Even if his words are irrational, try to empathize with him and understand the disease makes him feel this way.

• 7

  Lead by example. Work with the depressed person to improve both of your diets and exercise habits---this is healthy both for your bodies, minds, and your relationship.

• 8

  Keep a healthy distance from the depressed person. While you'll want to be there for your loved one, becoming overly-involved or giving too much advice may cause him or her to lash out at you and cause anger and frustration.