Couples Therapy for Depression

Depression is a clinical condition that makes people feel such despair, sadness or irritability that it affects their ability to participate in normal activities or relationships, including relationships with their romantic partner.



Struggling to address depression within one partner can cause problems for both and couples sometimes turn to couples therapy for help. Couples therapy for depression is an option for people who want to seek outside counsel in stabilizing and strengthening their possibly faltering relationship.

How Depression Affects Relationships

• Depression can cause strain on a couple’s relationship. A depressed individual may act tired, pessimistic, complain excessively or say unkind things. Romantic partners may feel distance or cut off from their depressed partner, as depressed individuals sometimes withdraw from relationships they once enjoyed.

  Romantic partners of depressed individuals may also feel resentful, as they may be working very hard to cheer up or encourage their partner without successful results and without receiving much demonstrated love in return.

When To Seek Couples Therapy

• Couples should decide for themselves when it becomes appropriate to seek couples therapy. However, there are some common signals that a relationship might benefit for couples therapy for depression. Therapy might be helpful in situations where communication breakdowns frequently become arguments, one or both partners withdraw from the relationship or when partners feel they are sharing living quarters, but not a relationship.

Couples Therapy And Depression

• During couples therapy for depression, a licensed therapist will guide partners through discussions about depression and its effects. Perhaps more importantly, partners have the opportunity to talk about their problems in a safe environment while learning communication tools and re-establishing their commitment to each other and the relationship.

  In some cases, therapy may involve helping an “unacknowledged” depressed partner to come to terms with their state of mind, and reach a resolution to address the problem.

  Partners may be given “homework” assignments to try out new communication techniques or strategies at home.

Choosing A Therapist

• While some couples therapists may advertise their specialized education in marriage counseling or depression treatment, this may not necessarily mean that both partners will feel a rapport with the therapist. Try calling a few therapists and speaking with them on the phone and set up an introductory appointment with those that might be a good fit.

  Partners may also feel comfortable asking trusted friends or family members for a reference.

Concerns

• Therapists can sometimes emphasize “saving” a marriage or relationship or emphasize divorce or separation for partners who are struggling, sometimes very painfully, to resolve differences. Therapy can be less successful in situations where the therapist’s inclination doesn’t match the desires of the couple.

  Another concern may be the condition of the depressed partner. One or both partners may be unaware that depression is present. If the depressed partner openly rejects the notion that depression is present, or feels hostile to the idea of attending couples therapy, it may not yet be the optimum time to pursue this option.