What to Do When Your Child Drug Tests Positive?

If your child has tested positive for drugs, you may be wondering what you should do next. Should you yell and ground him forever, forbid him from every seeing his friends again since they are obviously bad influences, get him some professional therapy, or sign him up for rehab or even boot camp? What you ultimately decide to do will depend on your child and how serious the problem is.

Talk

• Don't ignore the problem. After you have calmed down from the initial bad news and shock, act quickly and consider what you can do to help your child. One of the most important things you can do is talk with her about what is going on and why she is using drugs. Remember what it is like to be young and put yourself in her shoes. Find out if she is experiencing peer pressure or if there is some real issue you need to address that she is using drugs to try to escape.

Prepare

• Make sure you and the child's other parent are on the same page about what approach you are going to take when you talk with your child. Even if you disagree, you need to present a united front. You also need to think about what you are going to say when your child asks you if you have ever done drugs. Make sure you don't give him any leeway to make you feel guilty for your past and to make his drug usage seem okay.

Things to Avoid

• Do not have this discussion while your child is under the influence. Instead, wait until she is sober and can fully participate in the discussion. When discussing the issue of her drug use, try not to get angry or raise your voice. Focus instead on relaying how scared and hurt you are and how much you love her and don't want anything to harm her.

  You should also avoid threatening your child or giving her ultimatums. Don't ever get violent or be abusive either physically or verbally, and this includes using ridicule or sarcasm. You shouldn't try to make your child feel guilty or make her drug use about anyone but her.

Help & Discipline

• If you can't have a rational discussion with your child about his drug use, then see if there is someone else he is willing to talk to about it. Maybe there is another family member, a coach, his school guidance counselor, a minister or even a medical professional he is comfortable discussing this particular issue with.

  Don't let your child's drug use go without any consequences. Be clear about the house rules and your no drug policy. Then discuss what the punishment is going to be now and in the future for breaking the no drugs rule. Make sure you enforce the punishment.

Addiction

• If your child continues using drugs after you have confronted him, then you may need professional help. Research the various drug treatment options that are covered under your insurance plan first, but also consider programs that might not be covered that could be helpful to your child's recovery. If you are having trouble finding information, get in touch with your doctor, local hospitals, your school district's counseling office, churches, local mental health facilities or local substance abuse agencies.

  No matter what you do to help your child become drug free, make sure he knows that you really care and only want what's best for him.