How Can I Forgive Myself for Hurting My Family Because of Drugs?

Feelings of remorse remain a natural part of drug use but are neither practical nor helpful for moving on with one's life. A person's drug addiction may have caused emotional, financial and, in some cases, physical harm to members of the family. Being able to move forward requires an ability to forgive yourself without wallowing in self-pity, a state that can prevent healing.

Instructions

• 1

  Write down everything you can think of regarding ways you may have hurt your family while using drugs. Do not sugarcoat facts and be as honest as possible. Work on accepting these deeds as your own, not as something to blame on drugs. Only by taking full responsibility for your actions will you be able to fully forgive yourself.

• 2

  Make amends. You may feel consumed by regret over your actions, but it is impossible to undo what has already been done. When possible, show your family that you are starting a new chapter in your life by doing the best you can to prevent further trouble while working to repair past damage. If you owe money to family members, pay it back. If you've destroyed property, try to replace or fix it. If you've used painful words, apologize in person or by writing a letter. If you have stolen, admit to your crimes, no matter how severe the consequences.

• 3

  Find a counselor or therapist who specializes in drug addiction and talk openly and honestly about what you have done to hurt your family while abusing drugs. A professional has often heard just about everything, will not judge you for your past and will offer suggestions for ways you can learn to feel better about yourself.

• 4

  Help others. Another way to make amends is to actively help others who have similar experiences. Talk with other addicts about your life and listen to them as they talk about theirs. Having friends who have been through the same kind of ordeal will help you to feel less isolated, a necessary step in forgiveness. Once you realize you are not the only person to have hurt family while in the throes of an addiction, you will begin to move forward in your emotional healing.

• 5

  Stay sober. You will have a tough time forgiving yourself if you continue to use drugs. Attend support meetings, stay away from people, places and things that may trigger a relapse and focus on getting your life back on track. By continuing to do the right thing, it will be easier to forgive yourself for past indiscretions.