How to Use the Words of the Serenity Prayer

Protestant theologian Reinhold Neibuhr famously wrote: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference." This is known as the serenity prayer, serving as words of comfort and guidance to people of many faiths and backgrounds. Alcoholics Anonymous, a support group for recovering alcoholics, has adopted the phrase as a cornerstone of its philosophy. You can use the serenity prayer to overcome difficult times or just to get through the daily grind.

Instructions

• 1

  Speak the words out loud. Simply thinking about the prayer will not be as effective as speaking the words of the serenity prayer. Speaking requires a higher degree of mental activity and focus; this simple process has been shown to induce a higher level of absorption and understanding.

• 2

  Say the prayer not just in times of struggle, but in times of relative calm. Speak the words every day when you wake up and before you go to sleep. Through daily reminders and frequent utterances, the meaning of a prayer can become thoroughly embedded in our consciousness.

• 3

  Apply the prayer to your life by replacing its words with difficult elements in your life. If, for instance, you are struggling with alcoholism, use that challenge in your prayer. "Being an alcoholic is something that I cannot change," you might say. "Grant me the serenity to accept my disease." This will add focus to your prayer and allow you to apply its power to your struggles. Achieving this serenity is difficult, of course, but accepting its incontrovertible nature is the first step.

• 4

  Find the things in your life that you can change and use those elements in your prayer. For instance, you might say, "I have the power to stop drinking. Grant me the courage to change this behavior." Now that you have focused on a challenge you are able to overcome, you can begin to find ways to change the behavior. Reach out to peer groups, receive counseling, and find a new new hobby; when you set your mind to it, you can turn your life around for the better.

• 5

  Separate in your mind the things you can change and the things you cannot. This is the final phrase of the prayer, where you develop the wisdom to know the difference between unchangeable forces and achievable goals. Acquiring this wisdom and clarity of thought is challenging, but it is an essential aspect of the serenity prayer. Brainstorm ways you can tackle a problem; if you can think of no solutions, or your only solutions involve drastically altering the behavior of another individual, this challenge may be something you cannot change. If you can self-identify behaviors that have led to your challenge, you have likely found a struggle you can overcome.