How to Assist Your Parents in Moving to Senior Housing

Making the choice to move a loved parent into a senior housing can be a challenging process for all of the people involved. Children should keep in mind that the changes that occur during this time will likely cause a certain degree of stress for both the child and the parent. When a parent moves to senior housing, roles reverse between parent and child and the child becomes the person who is in charge of the parent. The process will involve some challenges but all can be overcome with thoughtful planning and caring behavior on the part of the child.

Instructions

• 1

  Conduct a candid conversation with your parents. Be aware that issues such as their self-esteem may arise during the discussion and that conversations about the move to senior housing may result in parents' feeling that their independence is being permanently taken away. Because these feelings are contrary to the way most people see themselves, it is important for the child to understand that their parent may be resistant to considering the move, at first. If this happens, listen to the needs of the parent to understand their concerns. It may be necessary to gently bring up the issue a few times before parents feels comfortable beginning an earnest search for senior housing.

• 2

  Talk to someone from outside the family when considering moving to senior housing; this can be helpful for the child and the parent. If aging parents refuse to speak with the child about the need for senior housing, it may be necessary to ask someone whom the parent respects, a personal physician, a member of the clergy or a representative of a government health and human services agency, for example, to talk with them about their needs. Even if a parent declines to have the conversation, it is often helpful for the child to talk with such people about his concerns.

• 3

  Assess the needs of the parent before making a final decision on moving into senior housing. The assessment should include a determination of the parent's medical and non-medical needs.

• 4

  Take time off from work while seeking senior housing. It takes considerable time to find an appropriate residence. After one has been found, help the parent move into the new home, then provide emotional support to help the parent adjust to the new stage in her life.