Activities on Insecurity & Jealousy

Those of us who have ever been serious about someone understand that insecurity can hurt an otherwise strong relationship. Insecurity leads to jealousy and most would rather conceal this potential relationship destroyer rather than admit to it. The most damaging aspect of insecurity and jealousy is that it can demolish a relationship when your partner is completely innocent. The good news is that you can do things to eliminate those insecure and jealous feelings.

Talk It Out

• Having an honest conversation can help ward off relationship insecurities.

  When feeling insecure within a relationship, the first inclination tends to be snooping around in your partner's personal items. It's easier to talk face-to-face with the source rather than rifle through belongings in an effort to validate insecurities. Going through your partner's personal things only encourages riskier behavior such as having him followed or checking e-mail. An open conversation can tell you much more about the status of your relationship.

Play the "What's the Worst That Can Happen?" Game

• Play out possible scenarios of a broken relationship.

  Ask yourself, "What is the worst that could happen?" He may break up with you or maybe she'll beg for forgiveness. Whatever the case, play out the scenario in your head and move on. Most often, we become jealous and insecure because we don't want to trudge into the unknown territory of what would happen if our partner decided to break up. Once you confront those fears, you can be more relaxed in the relationship instead of wondering about the what ifs.

Occupy Yourself

• Occupy your time and mind with other things.

  If you worry about where he is or why she didn't answer her phone, you're wasting your time. When you feel yourself agonizing over things like this, try occupying your thoughts with some other activity. Get a nighttime job such as bartending. Not only do you occupy your mind, you make money. Working out is another good option. It occupies time plus it's great for health, body and soul, which in turn, gives you more confidence.

Avoid Relationship Discussion

• Relationships should be kept private.

  Many of us have been guilty of telling our girlfriends about what our boyfriends did or didn't do last night. This opens up the discussion to people outside of the relationship and in most cases, doesn't result in anything more than partner bashing. Friends offer advice and give suggestions (wanted or unwanted), and may even cause more jealousy and insecurity. If you do solicit a friend's advice, be sure to weigh all options before deciding on how to react.

Considerations

• Therapy is always an option for both parties involved in the relationship. Agreeing to this shows a commitment to the relationship and can help a partner feel more secure within a relationship.