How to Overcome Being Shy

Shyness can be a major force in a person's life. If severe enough, shyness can cause debilitating anxiety or social anxiety disorder. More common and milder forms of shyness include a fear of public speaking, dating or meeting new people. Obstacles in life caused by shyness can be met head-on and overcome given time, a few simple techniques, a little hard work and practice. Shyness is fear, plain and simple. Beating your fears is never easy. It takes determination and a desire to change, but without these, the road could lead to a dead end. Find your road to success if you really want your shyness to change.

Instructions

• 1

  Find knowledge in books.

  Read a lot. The self-help section at the bookstore, your local library and the Internet are crammed with books dedicated to overcoming shyness, building confidence and conquering your fears. See Resources for some useful titles.

• 2

  Conversation can be fun.

  Learn to be a conversationalist. A good conversationalist is never at a loss for words. Psychologist Renee Gilbert suggests preparing subjects to talk about before hand. Brush up on topics relevant to the people you know whom you will see throughout the day.

• 3

  Practice having conversations with a close friend or family member who is aware of your shyness. This may seem awkward at first, but practice makes perfect. Have your helper begin a conversation about a subject unknown to you before hand. Practice your replies and try guiding the conversation in a different direction.

• 4

  Social networking builds confidence.

  Chat online or join a social website. This is a way to practice social interaction without the pressure of actual in-person social interaction. Here you can edit yourself until you think you have got it right, with no pressure to perform on the spot. You might meet some new people in the process, too.

• 5

  Take part in community events that interest you.

  Read the local newspaper's community activities section or local events calendar to look for events you could attend. All the practice in the world will never help you unless you put yourself out there. It may take a while for you to gain the confidence for this one, but again: practice, practice, practice. It will become easier with time.

• 6

  Acknowledge your development with a special treat.

  Reward yourself for small accomplishments. Don't focus on failure, rather reward yourself for trying in the first place. See failures as positive learning experiences.

• 7

  Get to know people who are shy.

  Join a support group with others who are in the same boat. Finding others challenged by shyness helps you see how others cope in uncomfortable situations. You could learn a thing a few things and maybe make some friends.