Steps to Help a Person With Depression

Most people know of the many different types and causes of depression, from postpartum depression to seasonal-affective disorder, SAD, to major-depressive disorder. But no matter what the type or cause, if you have a friend or relative who is depressed--not just a little bit grumpy or otherwise unhappy, but truly depressed--you probably want to offer real help. The good news: there are things you can do.

Don't Ignore the Potential Danger

• It's important to realize that depression can be a serious problem. If you suspect a friend or family member is so depressed he or she may not want to live, you should contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (800-273-TALK or 800-273-8255) right away to get help from a professional, or find a suicide crisis center nearby. Most forms of depression do not lead to suicide, but it not something to take lightly.

Recognizing & Talking About Depression

• What is depression exactly? It is more than a temporary sadness. Depression is marked by a persistent feeling that may be characterized by hopelessness, guilt, or worthlessness. Signs of a true depression usually include loss of interest in things that the person once enjoyed.

  Just because you have recognized symptoms of depression in a friend, however, doesn't mean he or she has recognized it, or is willing to admit it.

Taking Action to Help

• If you are worried about your friend's condition, even before he or she is ready to call it "depression," you can help.

  Be encouraging, and point out things your friend can appreciate in his or her life. Help your friend recognize and reduce some of the stresses with which she or he deals, and, if possible, recommend more constructive ways to handle those stresses. Let your friend know you care and others care. If depression is interfering with your friend's ongoing tasks, from yard work to balancing a checkbook, offer to help. You might need to be persistent; remember, depression can take away a person's usual desire to take care of anything. When you help your friend with a task, point out the productive nature of the work and sense of progress you may feel.

  While there are many avenues to take for treatment, from clinics to support groups to mental hospitals, many people prefer to start by speaking anonymously with another person, either by phone or online.

  You can help by giving your friend some options, including a pastor or other religious leader, a local social service agency or a hotline that he or she can contact for help or just to ask questions.

  When the time is right, most people can arrange an appointment with their family doctors to seek recommendations for making some behavioral changes that can help alleviate the depression. Many general practitioners can also recommend a counseling program, support group or mental-health specialist.

  But before that (and throughout your friend's battle with depression), you can encourage your friend to find a way out of his or her dark mood and help keep track of his or her progress. At the same time you're helping your friend, you should also help yourself. That means educating yourself about depression, how it manifests itself and how treatment may progress.

  Taking care of yourself also means keeping on top of your own mental and physical health, following a balanced diet, getting an adequate amount of sleep and maintaining contacts with a variety of people in your life.