Ways to Respond to Bipolar Tendencies

Erratic and severe mood swings. Impulsive behaviors. Sudden fits of crying and irritability. People with bipolar disorder or bipolar symptoms may exhibit the aforementioned symptoms at any time. Although there is much support and help available for people with bipolar disorder, it can be challenging to deal with the day to day realities of the condition. There are a number of techniques you can use to properly respond to someone with bipolar disorder.

Boundaries

• The National Institute of Mental Health website suggests that if you live with, care for, or are otherwise involved with someone suffering from bipolar disorder or with bipolar tendencies, you should make sure you also find time to take care of yourself. Setting up consistent boundaries is an effective method of ensuring that you stay mentally and emotionally healthy. Setting up boundaries is not about being mean, unkind or uncaring. Setting up boundaries is something you do for yourself to keep yourself healthy and making sure that the person with bipolar tendencies remembers and recognizes that it is ultimately his responsibility to treat his illness as best he can.

  To set up firm boundaries you first need to evaluate what behaviors or acts you find personally unacceptable. If you and the person exhibiting bipolar tendencies have shared finances, consider keeping a separate bank account or otherwise limiting his access to your finances. Because those in a manic state often go on wild spending sprees, it can be devastating for the partner or spouse of someone with bipolar disorder to discover that your savings have been rapidly depleted.

  After evaluating what behaviors are unacceptable, think of ways to remove the temptation from the person with bipolar tendencies. For example, if you find the person exhibiting bipolar behavior to be unbearable during a manic state, watch for warning signs that a manic swing is on the way. This may include excitability, reduced sleep or not sleeping at all, or excessive talkativeness. Remove yourself from the situation if possible. Also, remember that consistency is important. Don't accept the behavior once and then deem it unacceptable the next time. As much as the person with bipolar tendencies must respect those boundaries, you must respect yourself enough to consistently enforce them.

Support

• When dealing with someone with bipolar tendencies, it is very important that you offer encouragement and support. Perhaps the most effective way to do this is not during periods when the person is in a manic or depressed state, but when her emotions have stabilized. Discuss with the person your boundaries and genuinely tell her that you aren't setting up those boundaries out of hate or anger. Be there for the person when her struggles with her mental illness seems overwhelming. Remind her that she has periods of wellness and stability and that those times can come again. The article "Loving Tough: Dealing with a Bipolar Person" states that you are "needed as a sounding board, as someone who can confirm or deny which behaviors seem disorder-related and which are life-adjustment problems." Keep in mind that you are a "sounding board" not a "life-saver."

Realism

• When responding to bipolar tendencies, be realistic about the situation. Not negative, not pessimistic, but realistic. Create an environment in which you and the person with bipolar tendencies can be comfortable discussing his illness. Discuss what you will do if a particularly severe episode of depression or mania occurs. This not only shows your support, but you can also use these conversations to integrate your boundaries and needs into the overall plan.