How to Tell a Woman You Are a Narcissist

A healthy relationship requires both people involved to be honest with one another. Such honesty is a sign that two people are committed to the relationship. However, it is not always easy to be honest when it comes to disclosing that you have a personality disorder. If you have been diagnosed with a narcissistic personality disorder, it is a good idea to share this with the woman you are in a relationship with. Having this information can help her learn what types of behaviors to expect from you, which can make your relationship stronger.

Instructions

• 1

  Identify the right time to share that you have narcissistic personality disorder. It is not a good idea to bring up the subject while the two of you are rushing to get ready for work in the morning, or over the telephone. Prepare a nice lunch or dinner meal during a time when both of you can sit and talk.

• 2

  Be direct. Tell her that you want to share something of importance with her, so that she knows the material at hand is serious. Then, inform her that you were diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder.

• 3

  Take a moment to wait for her reaction. She might not have any idea about what it means to be a narcissist, or she might know right away what it means.

• 4

  Give her the clinical definition of what a narcissist is, and what some of the behaviors are. Explain to her that being narcissistic means you have an inflated sense of self, and that narcissism is tied to ego and vanity. However, while this egotism and vanity exists on the outside, people with narcissistic personality disorder are actually quite fragile on the inside and have a vulnerable self esteem.

• 5

  Allow her to ask questions. She may want to know more about the disorder, how long you've been diagnosed for, if there are treatments for it and what this means for the relationship. Anticipate such questions and be prepared with answers. Psychotherapy is a treatment option for people with personality disorders, and let her know if you plan on seeking that type of counseling. Reassure her that this does not change your relationship.

• 6

  Suggest to her that the two of you research more about the disorder together. There might even be support groups for women who are dating narcissistic men.

• 7

  Give her time to get used to the news. After all, this is probably shocking for her to hear from you. Offer her as much information as you can so that she feels closer to you.