How to Get Past Inhibitions

If you have trouble letting yourself get to a place where you don't worry about what people are thinking, what someone is doing or what your own inner fears tell you, you need to get to the root of your problem. From not feeling completely confident in the bedroom with your mate to not wanting to try a new food, there's a host of things that could be holding you back from feeling completely free to be yourself. To get past it means you'll have to figure out what keeps you feeling inhibited and learn to release it.

Instructions

• 1

  Explore what it is that makes you inhibited. Jot down a list of things you feel like you're constantly holding back on. Identify your reaction to those things that seem to bother you so that you have a starting point to making a change.

• 2

  Build your confidence. According to Cornell University psychologist Thomas Gilovich and his team of researchers, the "spotlight effect" is a phenomenon where a person tends to feel like no matter what situation he is in, people who surround him are fixated on his appearance and actions. Understand that you are not the center of attention in so many negative ways as you think, especially when you're out and about in regular everyday life. Learn to appreciate all of your strengths and weaknesses as part of your character that make you unique.

• 3

  Proceed with caution. Don't expect that you will feel liberated and willing to make a complete change overnight. Give yourself time to adjust to doing new things, even if that means you need to distract yourself. If you're terrified of dancing, take a dance class with others who are just as unfamiliar with the style as you. If you're not confident in the bedroom, turn down the lights and turn on some music to distract you from obsessing over your looks and noises.

• 4

  Laugh at yourself. If you fall, get back up, dust yourself off and laugh. Realize that whatever little petty things that happen to you have likely happened to dozens of others in even worse situations. Know that "things happen" so you don't have to focus so much on being perfect all the time. If you never try to order a different food because you're scared you won't like it, order a sample, and spit it out if you hate it.

• 5

  Imagine yourself doing everything you want to do, and keep a positive mind about it. Envisioning yourself being happy and free in a situation will help you feel that much more excited about cheerleading yourself to that place. Reward yourself as you make strides toward letting go.