Controlling Techniques Used by Angry Men

According to a study found on the National Domestic Violence Hotline's website, one in four women will be the victim of domestic abuse at some point in her life. In cases of domestic abuse, the abuser uses various techniques to control his victim. When the abuser controls his victim, she feels isolated, and may feel as though the abuse is her fault. Victims in these situations often find it difficult to leave for several reasons, including psychological manipulation, financial security and a belief that the abuser will change. According to the counseling center Emerge, domestic abuse is a learned behavior and not a disease. However, most abusers need professional help in controlling their anger.

Isolation

• An abusive man will try to make the victim feel as though she is entirely alone in her situation. When an abuser cuts off, or significantly decreases the victim's connections to the outside world, she is less likely to report the abuse or leave the situation. Forbidding the victim from interacting with certain people, visiting certain places or wearing certain items are all examples of techniques an abuser may use to control his victim.

Emotional Abuse

• An abuser will try to break down the victim's self-esteem so she feels unable to leave the situation. Emotional abuse may consist of the abuser making insults relating to the victim's appearance, intelligence or personality. The abuser may also manipulate situations so the victim believes the abuse is her fault. The abuser may also threaten to harm or kill himself as a way to make the victim feel trapped in the situation. A man may also try to convince the woman the abuse did not happen, or downplay it to the point that the woman may doubt her own perception.

Financial

• If he is in the position to do so, a controlling man may withhold financial resources to increase the victim's feeling of submissiveness to him and isolation from the outside world. The abuser will prevent the victim from getting her own job, and therefore cut off her access to financial freedom and outsiders. An abuser will often force the victim to ask him for money.

Physical Abuse

• Physical abuse and the threat of physical abuse is another way for the abuser to exert his dominance over the victim. Physical abuse includes any act that is intended to cause harm or intimidation. This includes hitting, pushing and unwanted sexual acts. An abuser may also threaten his victim with potential physical abuse, and may break or hit objects to display his capacity for that violence.