Therapy for Unmarried Couples

Therapy for unmarried couples is a common recourse for resolving issues before marriage, according to the The New York Times. While couples therapy was once relegated to married people, it has become a popular method for people to work out their problems before committing to marriage. The change in social mores and an increasing number of unmarried couples living together have also made therapy a good way to work out the kinks.

Identification

• According to Knapp Family Counseling, couples therapy targets the couple as one individual unit rather than each person separately. It examines the system created by the couple and working with both parties, attempts to rectify any inherent problems. Each therapist will work differently; some will insist the couples always meet together while others may want to work with each party separately and then together as a couple.

Significance

• According to The New York Times, couples therapy has become more popular for unmarried people because of the high divorce rate in modern society. People are aware of the high emotional and financial toll that a divorce invokes, so working out problems before entering into a marriage may be preferential. Also, cultural mores no longer dictate quick marriages, so many people use the freedom to work out their problems before committing.

Benefits

• While couples therapy is a tool to work out problems that exist in a relationship, there are also other benefits, according to The New York Times. In the past, people used to turn to relatives or religion if they had doubts or second thoughts about their upcoming nuptials. However, many unmarrieds also use therapy to sort out their own feelings about marriage and even use the therapist for a second opinion of the soundness of the relationship.

Potential

• Couples therapy can help solve problems that can potentially doom a marriage. It also opens a line of communication between the couple, allowing them a place where they feel safe to air their feelings and feel that they are not being ignored. It also prevents hurt emotions and resentments from building up and destroying the marriage years later.

Expert Insight

• According to Dr. Peter Fraenkel, who is an associate professor of couples and family therapy at the City University of New York, therapy for unmarried couples is a great preventative measure for people entering the marriage with preexisting problems. According to Dr. Fraenkel, more and more unmarried couples come to his practice than before, going "from about one in 12 in the early '90s to one in six by the start of this decade," he told The New York Times.