How to Identify Codependent Behavior

Trying to control something you cannot control is codependency in a nutshell. It began as a term used for people living with an alcoholic who tried to gain some control over the situation. This disorder can present itself anytime there is a need for self protection in an abusive relationship. Then it cycles through the generations until recovery is practiced. You may be codependent if you identify any of these symptoms in your behavior.

Instructions

• 1

  Expect perfection from others and try to be perfect. Feel you have to prove your love through your behavior. You are afraid of mistakes and feel like a bad person if you make one.

• 2

  Gain a sense of worth when other people do what you want them to do. Feeling strongly when your spouse or child makes a mistake is a sign of codependent behavior.

• 3

  Figure out what others want and feel to guide your wants and feelings. You ignore your needs and try to please other people.

• 4

  Give to others excessively. Gifts, time, attention and advice are all things a codependent will give in abundance in order to gain control.

• 5

  Identify other people's problems and mistakes easily and feel a strong need to give advice. However, you find it difficult to admit your own mistakes and will blame others instead. Feel anxiety, pity and guilt when faced with someone else's troubles, rather than a healthy amount of empathy.

• 6

  Find it difficult to protect yourself by setting boundaries. You say yes to things you don't want to do. Your behavior reflects what you think others want from you. A codependent finds it hard to identify their own needs, wants and opinions.

• 7

  Wonder why other people don't take stock in you like you do in them. You become overly offended by perceived uncaring and rudeness. You perceive people as selfish when they do not care excessively for your feelings the way you would theirs.