How to Deal With Disappoinments

Dealing with disappointments is important for your health and well-being. According to Michael Ashworth, Ph.D., at PsychCentral, people who are frequently disappointed have more physical and mental problems than those who aren't. People who are disappointed tend to have higher levels of stress and depression than people who deal effectively with their disappointments. Learning how to handle your disappointments in life will help you to feel better and should improve your relationships with others.

Instructions

• 1

  Change or rethink your expectations in life. People with high or unrealistic expectations will tend to be disappointed more frequently than people who are realistic about life. Ashworth suggests talking to family members and friends to help determine if your expectations in life are too high or are a direct cause of your disappointments.

• 2

  Decide if your disappointments are central to a certain person or event, specifically something that you are unable to change. Pinpointing a cause for your feelings can help you to figure out ways to overcome it. For example, if you are always disappointed with your mother because she does not keep her promises, you can tell yourself this is how she is and to be skeptical of anything she says in the future. If she follows through on a promise, that is great, but if she doesn't, you will have already been expecting it.

• 3

  Change your thought patterns about life and disappointments. Thinking negatively or focusing on the bad will only serve to perpetuate disappointments. Have a list of positive thoughts and affirmations to go to whenever you find yourself focusing on the negative aspect of your life and becoming disappointed.

• 4

  Check your communication style. Ashworth states many disappointments are the result of misunderstandings and miscommunications. Listen to what people have to say and ask them to repeat it in different words if you are uncertain what they mean. Having a clear picture will help you know what to expect and avoid being disappointed when things don't turn out the way you planned.

• 5

  Be willing to forgive. Disappointments can also be the result of holding on to anger and hurt. Holding onto that hurt can result in a damaged relationship that fails to live up to your expectations and therefore disappoints you. Forgiving someone for a past wrong can be a healing process for both people, one that results in an improved relationship.