How to Recognize When You've Been Insulted

With passive-aggressive behavior, a smile may be an insult. Recognizing an insult requires the double duty of reading body language and listening. It is important to remember that the person insulting you may not realize that they are being insulting. Often an accidental insult is a more of a reflection of a bad mood and not meant to offend. However, being aware of subtle insults in some social situations, such as dating, will save you from participating in a mismatched partnership.

Instructions

• 1

  Listen for verbal clues. Passive-aggressive insults are often veiled in polite behavior, but they leave behind clues. For example, someone declaring, "I would never do something like that," in response to your actions, is putting themselves above you without directly insulting you. It is best to respond to this type of insult directly and politely. Inform the person that his behavior has offended you. Ask why the person is upset and apologize for any thoughtless behavior that may have caused the insult.

• 2

  Read body language. Often an insult is in a physical gesture. Every culture has a collection of physical gestures that are meant to insult. These are sometimes easy to recognize, but occasionally a gesture is difficult to detect. An person who is angry with you will instinctively turn her gaze away to avoid eye contact and interrupt your conversation. Other signs might be crossed arms and legs, a curled lip or raised voice.

• 3

  Interpret behavior. Unintentional insults manifest as unanswered messages, missed appointments or late arrivals. These are not definite signs of insult, as these behaviors could have many different meanings. But they are also, potentially, another passive aggressive means of insulting you. The best way to find out is to ask the person if they intended to insult you. Instead of an insult you may find a friend in need.