How to Overcome a Fear of Talking

A fear of talking may arise from innate shyness, lack of confidence, or fear of failure and rejection. Like all forms of anxiety, the fear of talking can become self-perpetuating: the more the fear occurs, the more you dread it, until eventually you enter a vicious circle of anxiety and stimulus. A fear of talking may, for some people, dominate their lives, particularly if their work involves meeting new people on a regular basis. For others, they can function well in a small group, but possess a real dread of public speaking. If you have a fear of talking, you can take steps to help overcome it.

Instructions

• 1

  Focus on the other person in a one-to-one situation. People who must constantly meet strangers often use particular opening statements, such as "What is keeping you busy at the moment?" Many people enjoy speaking with an appreciative listener, and an opening question like this can give conversational opportunities, since the person's reply can lead to further conversation.

• 2

  Speak slowly if you need to make a public speech. It is a mistake to talk quickly in a bid to get to the end of your ordeal as quickly as possible. If you speed up, you trigger physiological responses in yourself such as a dry mouth and a racing heart. These physical symptoms make you more anxious. Remember that your audience usually wants to enjoy what you say. Even if your speech is not absolutely brilliant, some of the listeners will respond all the more favorably to you because of this.

• 3

  Practice conversation. Initiate casual conversations at a store or at work. Small talk is not a waste of time: it helps you oil the wheels. Concentrate on putting other people at their ease. Remember that other people struggle with talking to others as well. Also, remind yourself that the other person may be focused on something of pressing concern to herself rather than than every nuance of your conversational ability.

• 4

  Smile. Practice a relaxed body posture. Remember that a tense posture makes you feel more anxious. Consider relaxation or yoga lessons which help with breathing techniques.