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Strategies for Managing Anger

Do you find yourself blowing your top easily? These anger management strategies can help you stay calm even in a heated situation. The strategies are aimed at preventing anger triggers, relaxing your body, and changing your attitude so that you can deal with a tough situation and properly manage your anger.

  1. Prevention

    • The best way to stop from getting angry is to prevent it to begin with. First, identify your anger signs. Some people clench their fists, breathe more quickly, or feel very hot right when they angry. By identifying these signs, you will be able to recognize when you are about to get angry. Second, keep track of when most of your anger triggers occur. Are they at night right before you go to sleep? Early in the morning when you're not quite up yet? After weekly meetings at work? Identify the times and situations that are most likely to hit your anger buttons, and either avoid the situations (if possible), or prepare yourself beforehand so you won't get angry.

    Relaxation

    • Meditation and deep breathing can help you relax when you feel yourself about to explode with anger. If you need to walk away from the situation for a few minutes, that's far better than blowing your top. Practice affirmations that you can say when you're angry, such as "I'm frustrated, but this will pass" or "I can stay calm." If possible, try distracting yourself from the situation, either by exercising, reading a chapter from a good book, or listening to music. When you come back to the situation later, you may find yourself able to view it more logically.

    Change of Attitude

    • Sometimes it's not so easy just to walk away and relax. When you're stuck in an anger-producing situation, you can change your attitude to keep yourself calm. For example, if you're starting to feel angry that the whole world is against you, restructure your thoughts by thinking "I know that there are people who do care about me, but I'm so frustrated that I'm focusing on the people who don't." Instead of thinking "I need to have that, and you're not giving it to me!" you can think "I would definitely like to have that, but I don't need it, and I'll be fine if I don't get it." Watch out for the words "never" or "always" when they run through your thoughts. Almost nothing happens "never" or "always." Replace those words with "sometimes" or "rarely," and you may find yourself calming down considerably.

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