How to Develop Spirituality

When a crisis hits, you need an ability to transcend yourself at least long enough to hold on to something higher than the crisis itself. Many people don't do this, however, simply because they are not affiliated with a particular religion. But spirituality is not the same as religion. Regardless of religion, if you intend to develop the spiritual component of your personality, you have to be willing to look deeply into yourself and begin to listen.

Instructions

• 1

  Most people have substituted the external view of life for the internal because we’ve been taught by well-intended authority figures that if we look within we are going to find all kinds of evil. You won't find evil, but you will find some ways in which you trick and delude yourself. Also when you look within you will also find strengths, vulnerabilities, hopes, dreams, longings, desires and passions. All of these in combination will help you to develop your spirituality.

• 2

  When you find your own trickery within, the first thing to remember is that berating yourself is not going to help you develop anything. You don’t trick yourself because you are evil. You trick yourself because you are bargaining with realities you think would otherwise overwhelm you. However, while it may work for the short-term, self-deceit is not going to work in the long haul, because you will keep meeting the same realities. So, when you find your own trickery see it as the survival technique it is. Then look again at the realities you've been trying to avoid.

• 3

  Once you have looked at those realities, the next step is to begin to accept them. “Accepting life on life's terms" is one of the spiritual lessons of Alcoholics Anonymous. Acceptance is not forgiveness—a word fraught with the religious connotation of atonement. Rather acceptance is a simple recognition that a particular reality is what it is. However, it does not necessarily mean that there is nothing that can be done about it. In fact, it is through acceptance that you are able to name a solvable problem correctly and begin to develop some effective solutions. This kind of acceptance takes "God-as-fortune" out of the equation. In other words, you stop assuming that misfortunes are evidence of God's punishment.

• 4

  When you find vulnerabilities in your soul-search, you should rename them as strengths, because that's exactly what they are. Your vulnerabilities will tell you what you need, what you want and the deepest facets of your own spirituality. Start a dialogue with your vulnerabilities and listen to what they are telling you about your needs, about your emptiness, about your design on life. These vulnerabilities can be your guide for creating a spiritual life.

• 5

  Finally, begin to develop a listening posture. Those with a religious background tend to fill the air with lots of praying, lots of talking to God—whoever that is for you. Listening is different. Listening is hearing the music of your own spirit and whatever Higher Power you find there within you. Meditation is such a listening posture. But there are many others such as taking a walk, creating, cooking, writing or singing. If you want to develop your spirituality, listening is the ultimate way. The truth is that the minute you started looking within, you started listening. Keep doing that for it leads you to your personal highest truth.