How to Confront a Bully

Bullies come in many forms, and if you don't stop them early on, they'll continue to pick on you. The trick is to confront a bully in a way that doesn't ignite further anger of violence.

Instructions

• 1

  Know when someone is a bully. A bully is usually a good liar, talkative and often vindictive. They direct attention to themselves and are quick to criticize others. Bullies control people and conversations and do not stay on one topic for very long.

• 2

  Find a time and place where you can confront the bully. Plan what you'll say ahead of time and use a private location where you will not be interrupted. If you confront a bully in front of others, he may feel goaded by pride to resort to violence. Expect the bully to try and control the situation. Remain positive and friendly to avoid escalation into a fight or argument.

• 3

  Confront the bully with the truth. A bully usually believes they are right and see themselves as smarter than others. This means they react with anger when presented with the truth, so be ready.

• 4

  Describe the situation and your perspective and let him know you want to try to work things out. Explain which actions you disagree with, such as comments made to you or behind your back. Ask him to clarify what he meant, listen to the answer and thank him for discussing it with you.

• 5

  Set boundaries by saying no to any behavior that is unacceptable. Be consistent and continue to discuss things when the behavior comes up again. Remind her how she is affecting you and repeat your statements consistently without explaining yourself.

• 6

  Have your children ask direct questions, like "Why are you picking on me," and "Have I done something to you?" Instruct them to state clearly that they don't want to fight. If that doesn't work, tell your children to advise the bully to leave them alone or they will tell the teacher or his parents.

• 7

  If the bully yells or the conversation escalates the fight, walk away and try again at a later time. Do the same if she is not listening or takes a phone call during the conversation.