How to Communicate With a Passive-Aggressive Person

Passive aggressive communication can be infuriating if taken for face value: the culprit will often use sarcasm, mismatched expressions with tone of voice and often try to blame others for their unhappiness. Passive aggression is a way for the angry, powerless and insecure to say what they feel or sabotage someone, while avoiding confrontation. For example, it would seem inappropriate to confront someone's rudeness if they sounded nice and smiled. Because of this you need to know how to either play the passive aggressive game -- or step outside of it.

Instructions

• 1

  Determine how often you must communicate with the passive aggressive person: is he your co-worker, roommate, boss, friend, or spouse? If the person does not have ties to you and it is possible for you to avoid her, then do so.

• 2

  Remain calm while interacting with the passive aggressive person. Often they will say or do mean things subtly and try to get you to show your anger. Passive aggressive people want to appear to be the victim. When he says something rude, remember that he is trying to make you angry.

• 3

  Point out the behavior. If you have landed in an argument with a passive aggressive person you will need to turn the tables on her. Calmly explain the irrational behavior she is exhibiting and she will most likely deny it. Do not argue with the denial, accept it -- explaining that you just wanted to talk about the behavior.

• 4

  Explain the argument or communication from both sides. If you rationally explain both points of view, the passive aggressive person will have trouble appearing like the victim and will be unable to make it look like you were attacking him.

• 5

  Ask the passive aggressive person what she would do to solve the issue. Most passive aggressive people avoid giving advice or taking responsibility because they will not have someone else to blame. This will give you the upper hand in the argument because you showed your ability to cooperate, while she refused.