Ten Principles of Respectful Caregiving

Caregiving takes many forms, depending on the special needs, circumstances, age or ability of the person in need of assistance. Aside from the specific caregiving tasks at hand, respect is something that can and should be incorporated into any and every caregiving situation.

Be Patient

• The old adage “patience is a virtue” holds much wisdom, and in caregiving, patience is not only virtuous but imperative to respectful care of children, adults and the elderly. People with special needs often require more time to complete certain tasks or require assistance to perform basic activities, such as eating and dressing.

Listen

• All people are unique individuals with different needs and wants. Part of respectful caregiving is being able to discern those needs and wants and to try and accommodate them within the framework of caregiving that’s suitable or appropriate to the dependent’s condition or circumstance. Give the dependent you are caring for a chance to express his needs, wants or concerns. Even if you cannot fully provide or allow the request, listening with a genuine intention to incorporate needs and wants in some manner is a respectful way to give your dependent an active role in decision-making or negotiation.

Take Gradual Charge

• Whether you are caring for someone else’s child or an elderly parent, taking charge gradually is crucial to respectful caregiving. Assuming total control from the onset may confuse children or offend those who’ve spent years of their life heading a family. Be gentle when offering help or making decisions, packaging your direction rhetorically as guidance and suggestion as opposed to commands, demands or orders to maintain respectful, but safe and effective, caregiving.

Reflect and Reassess

• A successful caregiving strategy or agenda that may have worked six months ago may not be suitable now, as both your and your dependent’s situations will continually fluctuate and change. Children develop, the elderly grow less able-bodied, you might move or experience a change in schedule. By continually reflecting upon your and your dependents circumstances, needs and abilities, you will be able to provide the best care possible for a given situation, which is respectful to the person needing your assistance or guidance.

Be on the Same Level

• Even people who don’t require special assistance or care don’t like to feel talked down to, shouted at or hovered over. When communicating with your dependent, maintain eye level and contact with her. Kneel down to a child’s level or pull up a chair beside a senior’s bed or wheelchair to avoid looking and speaking down to him, which can make him feel inferior.

Provide Opportunities

• Much of caregiving involves doing things for those who cannot do them for themselves; however, respectful caregiving also involves providing opportunities for your dependent to do the things she can do on her own. Allow children to dress themselves, give older dependents an opportunity to stroll -- whatever tasks he or she may be able to perform without assistance. Also provide opportunities for meaningful experiences -- such as crafts or storytelling -- to give your dependent an opportunity to explore and develop his talents or skills.

Respond Promptly to Distress

• Perhaps a child in your care scrapes her knee, or the incontinent senior you are caring for has an accident. Whenever your dependent is hurt or uncomfortable, it is essential to respond immediately. Promptly providing a brightly colored band aid or a fresh undergarment pad is not only ethical, it also lets your dependent know you are respectful and attentive to all of his needs.

Base Activities Upon Interests

• Everyone has interests, even those who aren’t able to engage in them quite as easily as others. Whether you are caring for a dinosaur-obsessed child or an ex-serviceman with a love of World War II documentaries, incorporate those interests in daily plans however and whenever you can.

Be Gentle

• A large part of caregiving involves assisting others with personal hygiene. Be gentle when wiping or washing skin, faces or other areas that may be sore or sensitive. Same goes for washing or styling hair, spoon feeding or moving one’s body from one place or position to another.

Practice Equality

• Although many people have special needs, it is never because they are less than or beneath anyone else in any way. Treat your dependent with equality, as you would anyone else. Talk, share experiences and engage in activities together without patronizing or being overly cautious with your dependent to give them the decency and respect all people deserve, regardless of age or ability.