How to Increase Personal Safety after Leaving an Abusive Relationship

Congratulations, you've left your batterer. This may be the hardest thing you will ever have to do. In fact, it often takes several attempts before a woman permanently leaves an abusive relationship. But it is not the time to let your guard down. The period immediately after leaving is potentially the most dangerous for a woman. Take necessary precautions to ensure your continued safety.

Things You'll Need

• Color copies of your batterer's photograph
• Home security system (including cameras and outside lighting)

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Instructions

• 1

  Seek a restraining order against your batterer. This will make it illegal for him to come in contact with you physically, over the phone or on the internet. A restraining order will not guarantee that your batterer will not contact you, but in the event that he does, he risks being arrested. Keep a copy of your restraining order on you at all times.

• 2

  Avoid public places where you are likely to encounter your batterer. You may also consider moving to a new neighborhood or even a different part of the country if you feel this will ensure your safety.

• 3

  Secure your home. Install a security system, cameras and outside lighting. Change the locks if you have remained in the same residence where you were living with your abusive partner.

• 4

  Inform neighbors that your partner no longer lives with you and ask them to alert the police immediately if he is seen near your home. Give them a copy of your batterer's photograph so they know who you are referring to.

• 5

  Change your cell phone number or get a new account. This is particularly important if your batterer was responsible for paying the bill or if you were both on the same plan. This will prevent him from contacting telephone company to request a list of your incoming and outgoing calls. Such a list can make it easy for him to track your whereabouts.

• 6

  Inform the teachers at your children's schools about the situation. Tell them that you and your batterer are no longer in a relationship. Ask them to contact the police if he is seen near the school or the children. Leave a copy of the batterer's photo with the school officials who oversee child pick-up.

• 7

  Ask the secretary or receptionist at your workplace to screen all of your incoming telephone calls. If your batterer attempts to contact you at your workplace, he is breaching the restraining order. Call the police.

• 8

  Set up your own post office box. Open a bank account exclusively in your name, if you have not already done so. This will put you well on your way to self-sufficiency.

• 9

  Talk to a professional who specializes domestic violence cases. A trained professional can help you deal with the situation and increase your safety after leaving an abusive relationship.